T-116 day one done 116 to go...

So fifty pounds is the magic number for weight-loss. I can do this. I will not quit again. I can't afford to quit again, I want my life back. I have had one heck of a headache since yesterday from not having sugar. This is when I tend to give up on the first day. The withdrawal headaches suck and they last for about a week, but I am continuing to remind myself that after it goes away I stop getting them. It so easy to go back to the norm and so hard to reintroduce the good habits. 

This week I am giving up sugar and soda. This is the top of my list of priorities for the first week. I know I can't give up everything at one time so simple (or not so simple) changes added each week. I challenge each of you to pick one thing to change this week and to build on each week. The changes will also be adding things in.

Today for breakfast I ate my egg bread with a slice of turkey bacon. Healthy yummy breakfast sandwich. 

Today I will be doing a simple cardio since my head is still pounding so much. The little changes will make big differences. A lot can happen in 90 days and I can't wait to see the results at the end of these 90 days.

Tonight's dinner:

Crockpot Lasagna

1 1/2 lbs ground beef/turkey

1 onion

1 1/2 c low sugar spaghetti sauce (less than 5g)

1 1/2 c fat-free cottage cheese

1 egg, beaten

1 c grated mozzarella cheese, divide in half

1/2 tsp Italian seasoning

Brown ground beef with onion in skillet. Add spaghetti sauce and mix with meat and onion.

Pour half of meat mixture in slow cooker. Sprayed with nonfat cooking spray.

In a small bowl, mix together the cottage cheese, egg, and Italian seasoning.

Beat we'll with fork.

Spread half of the cheese mixture.

Sprinkle 3/4 c of mozzarella over cheese mixture.

Repeat layers.

Cover and cook on low 4-4 1/2 hours.

T-117 countdown to 40th begins...

... And with it a new resolve to do better. I have turned into the old me the me I promised I would never be again. It's so easy to eat what you want and not worry about working out. Unfortunately, with this comes all the ailments of not working out. The extreme tiredness, the lack of excitement, the feelings of self-loathing, lack of self-esteem and the list can continue to go on and on. Yesterday I purchased my tickets for San Francisco for my fortieth birthday trip which means the day is in sight and it is time for me to reach the goal I had set for me this year. 

Today I am making Egg Bread to make sandwiches on. It tastes yummy and gives you the satisfaction of bread.

Egg Bread

Divide 4 eggs 

In a bowl mix 4 egg yolks, 1/4 c cottage cheese, 3 tbs Parmesan cheese

Mix together the four egg whites until foamy, mix in 1/4 tsp cream of tartar. When peaks from you will fold into yolk mixture.

Cook on cookie sheet with parchment paper or in muffin tin. Makes 6-8. I also like to make it in a loaf pan and then Cut it like bread.

Cook at 300 for 35-40 minutes.

Today I will be making egg salad sandwiches with it. I know it's a lot of egg but I don't do that often and egg salad sounds super yummy to me.

For dinner I will be making sesame chicken with quinoa.

2 boneless chicken breasts

Salt and pepper

1 tbs olive oil

3 coconut aminos

2 tbs rice wine vinegar

2 tbs honey

1 garlic clove

1 tsp cornstarch

1/2 tsp ground ginger

1/2 c thinly sliced green onions

2 tsp sesame oil

1 tsp toasted sesame seeds

Quinoa 1 c dry quinoa 

             2 c chicken broth

Season chicken with salt and pepper

Heat oil add chicken and sauté about 4-6 minutes stirring occasionally until cooked.

While chicken is cooking whisk together aminos, rice wine vinegar, honey, garlic, ginger, and cornstarch until combined. When the chicken is cooked through, add the green onions and aminos mixture to the pan and stir immediately to coat the chicken. The sauce will thicken quickly. Stir in sesame oil, then remove from the heat and serve over the quinoa.

One of our favorites. It is so yummy!

Why is this so hard?

I haven't been on for a while and I was in hiding from everyone. Hiding the fact that I had gone backwards many many pounds. This past weekend was a good one for me. Boyd and I decided that it was time for the two of us to do this together. I have great support and need to start afresh and am ready to. I worked out today and are well for the first time in a while. Thanks to Nicole and her amazing dressing recipe I made the best salad. Yummy. I can eat homemade salads. I always like salads from places but normally not from home. Here's to a fresh start!

One day of negativity and then l'll be back

I was on such a high yesterday that ended up backfiring and I was definitely not trying to hurt anyone by it I was trying to help. Well, I screwed up and bad. Today has been an emotionally draining day. A few things have surfaced that in all my happiness I had forgotten. I still am a people pleaser and I still feel awful when someone reminds me of what I did wrong. I was in the wrong, but only 98%. Hindsight is 20/20 and if I could go back I would. I have had a broken dam gushing down my face. I am not perfect and I never have claimed to be. As a human we make mistakes. I am allowing myself this one day to feel sorry for myself and then tomorrow continue with the growth and transformation I am working so hard on.

On a positive. I took a picture of me yesterday and felt like I looked good for the first time ever.

I'm back for real...

After getting lost on the road to weight loss I finally found my way back. I gained back 17 pounds which is super frustrating but I had some issues I had to work out in order to get back on the path. 

This weekend we spent with my amazing sister-in-law Nicole who looks amazing and helped inspire me to get going again. I am back and hope to stay on track, but even if I get lost it is not the end of the world and I can always find my way back. 

This Saturday I am running a 5k with an amazing friend and Emma. It is a night run and will be a lot of fun! I love these races and the feeling of accomplishment. 

I haven't posted on here since I ran my half marathon two weeks ago. I had hurt my ankle and not run for a couple of weeks prior. I ran all but the last half mile. I hit a wall on the last hill and just couldn't run another step. I feel like a rock star since I have never run that far at one time before and took a half hour off of my time from the last time I ran this race. I continue to amaze even myself with what I can accomplish. I need to go downstairs and run my three miles, I was hoping the rain would stop but we need it so I won't complain. Life is good and only gettingn better so I will continue to chug along.

Today, I decided that the toughest part for me is coming up with what to eat and then fixing it. It is so much more convenient to grab something at a fast food place unless you decide to cook for four hours and get everything prepared. Here is what I have been doing. I have the top shelf full of proteins the next shelf has fresh veggies cut up for easy treats as well as roasted veggies for meals. Under that there are waters, then hummus which I am going to like;-), eggs followed by apples and other misc veggies! One week of food in one afternoon.

Sometimes things are hard

The last couple of weeks I have detoured. I am back on the right road again and can't wait to see where this journey continues taking me. 

Sometimes you will see you have to go down a little but each step leads you in the right direction. I'm gone down the hill a few times over the past couple of weeks. I don't know what happened to me and I am sure it won't figure it out bit one misstep doesn't mean that I have to fail. It is just an opportunity to grow into the person I want to become. Becoming stronger each time you make a mistake because you realize you can move forward and don't have to continue to move backwards. I am strong and confident I just needed to remind myself of these things again. I love me and though I am a little disappointed in myself I am also proud of myself for climbing back on the correct path. 

Happy Sunday

As I sit here enjoying making a yummy meal that is healthy for the family I realize how good my life is. Things are turning around for the good in our home. We are achieving things that we have been working on forever and I am finally turning into the me I have wanted to be for years. I'm no longer scared of reaching my goals. Why are we scared of such dumb things? My fear was of failure but unless you try you will never prove to yourself you can succeed. 

Today I am wearing a pair of jeans I bought a couple of years ago. I really liked them and decided that I would get I to them some how. When I started on this journey I could not get them passed my calves. Today I was able to button them up and wear them! 

The coloring isn't good since the blinds were open but they fit!!! I am now down 48 pounds and feeling so good! 

Failure is a choice to not try. The person who comes in last at the end of the race beat every person who was not willing to get off of the couch! Remember you will only fail if you refuse to try. One step at a time is all that it will take. Baby steps lead to huge accomplishments.